Deafness has made me hyper aware of positioning.
I jockey for the best position on the bus or subway- where I can easily see the signs that will indicate my stop- or the overhead LCD screen that scrolls information about where the train currently is. Being in the wrong place, for most people, merely means being next to someone that smells odd, or being cramped into an uncomfortable position that is too far from the commuter-straps. To me, it means missing my stop- perhaps speeding off on a local-turned-express to Brooklyn or to Queens, or missing my stop on an Amtrak train. Ending up an hour or two out of my way.
It’s not only on the busses and trains, though. I’ll seek out the best table in the restaurant, and the chair that will allow me to sit with my back to the wall or to the corners to minimize the number of directions that background noise can assault me from. Most people deal with background noise. I deal with background noise amplified and fed-back through my hearing aids. Flattened out into what resembles a constant buzz of sound, rather than anything individually identifiable.
And cars- on a road trip I’ll try for “shotgun” (translation: passenger seat, not back seat). It’s the difference between being able to follow a conversation at all, and not being able to- except for tiny bits glimpsed in the rear-view mirror. Sitting shotgun, I can twist around in my seat and see both those behind me, and the driver. Otherwise I’m pretty much isolated by that two-foot shift in position.
A classroom- sitting in one chair vs. the other can mean passing vs. failing miserably. In a doctor’s waiting room, it can mean the difference between making and missing my appointment. At a job interview, it can make me seem like a confident young woman that understands every word–or a fumbling miscommunication. Standing in line in a grocery store at a slight angle rather than straight-on will allow me to see the stockboy and know that he’s shouting “excuse me!”, so that I can move out of the way and not be run over.
Everyone experiences the subtle influence that a small shift in position can have, but I don’t think that many hearing people experience it with such frequency, or with such every-day impact.
March 29th, 2006 at 7:26 pm
LCD screens on buses - I wish. In fact I wish the buggers worked on trains and trams. I once got on a train which had my destination on the LCDs but went somewhere completely random. I was FURIOUS especially when the conductor said “the announcement said CorrectDestination”. Useless waste of space. I even rerouted both me and another girl who had got ‘confused’ using WAP and my phone via better and quicker routes than the useless conductor. Grrrr.
I’m usually quite assertive about picking my place when eating out (rare) or when in a group. I put kim on my bad side so that I can hear everyone else. I won’t have this issue quite so bad sometime within the next 12 months cos I’m going bilateral. I’ll still have a ‘bad’ side, but it won’t be a ‘dead’ side.
I prefer the passenger seat too, and usually get it in our current car which is big enough in the back for tall people to sit comfortably. In my ex’s car I was ALWAYS stuck behind his seat cos at 6′6″ in a tiny car there was zero legroom behind him. Have you ever tried a lipreading mirror (a small stickon mirror) in the car? My mum had one when I was a kid, and we had one on our car until the wretched thing fell off for the umpteenth time and I sat on it. I really ought to get a better replacement. If I am in the back I’ll often plug in my music and read a book (yes I get LESS sick if I read than if I don’t) and ignore the other passengers - it’s not worth the headache. My younger sister seems to have given up fighting me for the frontseat, and just lets me have it - which I don’t complain about.
I remember at college I had decent seats in all my classes, where I’d worked out the optimum position based on the teacher’s position. I was amazed when after the first class EVERY single tutor tactfully asked for ‘a word’, checked I was ok with hearing them and offered to shift anyone who was sitting in a place I felt was better for me. It wasn’t until uni I had the hell of lipreading a wandering lecturer - it was worse when he was asked to stop, cos he rocked instead (he did try poor thing but he couldn’t lecture fluently while straining to not walk about). No wonder I used to get dizzy and fainty after his lectures!
My GP is ok she sits kind of side on, and is usually good about not typing on the computer while she’s talking back to me. Although today in ENT was diabolical as usual - I didn’t hear the useless nurse woman mumble my name. You’d think she’d learn, it’s a bloody hearing aid (BAHA) clinic *grr*. I was sitting and SIGNING at kim, I mean did she NEED any more indication that I might be deaf. Thankfully the registrar herself was really audible and female with a mild Mancunian accent - so easy for me to hear!
I quite often phase out in shops, the noise and people completely spaces me out. I find I am better without the hearing aid, and relying on my terrible lipreading (I can’t do it completely audio free). I do get crashed into by people all the time as I don’t hear them come up behind me and step into them - or I don’t hear them saying “excuse me” I have been known to be facing the speaker, watching their face and not realising that they are actually moving their mouth. If I’m with kim we make a point of using sign which generally gives people a clue and means they don’t expect me to hear.
kim says that she finds that differences in position make a huge difference in her ability to parse and hear speech. She says it is a directional thing and something about high/mid frequencies being attenuated by the position of the head. I don’t know if kim has any hearing loss as a result of chronic glue ear as a kid. Need to get hold of an audiometer and play me thinks. In fact I’d say I can hear her better when looking away than she can hear me - on average. I guess I’m better at processing garbled/distorted and partially heard speech.
March 29th, 2006 at 8:14 pm
Natalya, what’s a “lipreading” mirror?
March 30th, 2006 at 5:49 pm
Can I answer that? Natalya even provided me with one…
It’s an extra mirror, like a small rear-view one, which is positioned so that I (passenger) can see Jasmine’s (driver’s) lips without having to get a bend in my neck.
March 30th, 2006 at 5:52 pm
As for the other points about positioning – I totally agree. I’m very, very conscious of how essential it is to be in the right place in order to feel vaguely aware of things when travelling. As Natalya says, in the UK some of these things tend not to work (or not to exist). The most annoying thing is an apparent mismatch between the LCD and a not-quite-heard announcement. Also, I’ve found train conductors are much better in the US at coming and telling me when the right station is getting close. In the UK they are sometimes inclined to forget.
March 31st, 2006 at 11:03 am
Hi ho hum, yes I do that too!! mainly in college though, where I have to side face on the the ‘wandering’ lecturer
although, she is a gem and always provides me with notes before class, the only downfall I find in the class is the tutorial afterwards where by we all discuss the art history lectur and I loose what the people behing me are saying. because I cant see their faces.
Im going bilateral on friday 7th april I officially got an appointment today finally!! I was supposed to get them in feburary!! but no that would never happen!!
March 31st, 2006 at 3:33 pm
Yay - very glad that you now have a date for getting some serious hearing aids, Lette.
I’m lucky with the tutorials I give as they tend to be for very small groups (anything between 1-4) and I sit them in a semi-circle in front of me so that I can keep an eye on them all
March 31st, 2006 at 4:38 pm
I always used to hate class discussions cos I couldn’t work out who was speaking in time to look at them and lipread them. My personal tutor at uni was great she would try and remember to repeat everything from the front, or write it down so I had as much of it as possible.
Good luck for going bilateral Lette, you’ll have to tell me what it is like! I gave my Dr’s registrar the go ahead for another hearing aid for me on Weds, although it requires me to have minor surgery for another implant. Apparently I should either get a date within 4 months, or the procedure in 4 months - don’t know which. I’ll get the hearing aid 12-15 weeks after the procedure after osseointegration happens.
I’ve never had binaural (it won’t be true stereo) hearing before, always had the bone conduction transducer on my right side (better cochlear) although my first hearing aids had the mic on the left - I remember it taking me 2 years to get used to switching ‘deaf sides’.